It was a dark and stormy space and all of the space-people were at space-home space-sleeping in their space-beds. A space cruiser space-cruised slowly through space. On board this space cruiser was space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4. All space-bandits and space-thugs, space-junkies and space-Gs feared Spaceman alike, for when space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4 was on space-patrol, no evil space-doer was safe. Space-people of space-town of the greater space-state "Space-owa" in space quadrant LX4 space-slept soundly knowing his space cruiser was space-cruising for their space-safety...but there was one who dared to question his space-authority: Space-general Makha Dashka of the Intergalactic Space-Army, a real space-slug. In the great space-battles of Space-War II he commanded the space-troopers into space-combat with a vicious zeal. Now, space-bent on space-power, Makha Dashka seeks to have all space-people bow before him as he sits on his space-throne in the space-hall of his space-palace. There's only one space-problem
space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4, bows to nobody. Fed up with his space-insolence, Mahka Dashka space-vowed to destroy Spaceman once and for all. But how? A supernova-bomb? A black hole-generator? A quasar canon? No, too easy. Makha Dashka was a great space-general after all, he preferred hand to hand space-combat, but Spaceman is space-famous for his space-boxing and Makha Dashka knows he could never defeat him. So how? Aha! The answer was right in front of Makha Dashkas space-helmet all along. The only way to truly destroy Spaceman is by breaking his space-heart
Space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4 was space-cruising in his space cruiser when he noticed his space-gas was nearing empty. Pulling into the nearest space-gas-space-station, Spaceman space-docked his space cruiser with the space-pump to fuel up. Due to the enormity of his space-tank, Spaceman knew this was going to take a lot of space-time so Spaceman decided it would be space-smart to hit the space-store and get some space-grub and take a space-leak. He opened the main space-doors to the space cruiser, space-stepped out onto the landing bay, and space-walked towards the space-store. The space-sign above the space-store read, "Space-savings inside!" It glowed bright and space-hummed loudly as he passed underneath. This was a bad part of space-town and Spaceman knew it, but he had no fear for he was space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4. He grabbed a space-brew from the space-cooler and threw a space-coin down on the counter. As Spaceman walked towards the space-toilet the space-clerk space-scoffed, "Miller Space-life, eh? Aren't you aint sposed to be even space-drinkin' on the space-job, pal?" Spaceman space-pivoted on his space-heel and space-shot him a space-glare that could turn the space-hairs of a Glmork space-white. Without having to say a single space-word he said it all, "I'm space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4, space-dammit." As he space-walked down the space-hall to the space-toilet the female space-toilet space-door flew open and out space-walked a beautiful space-woman with space-red hair and a space-butt to think about for space-days. "Get out of my space-way, space-creep!" She blew past Spaceman and out of space-sight. Spaceman's space-heart raced at the space-sight of her. He shook his space-head to space-shake her off of his space-mind and continued to the space-toilet. At the space-toilet toilet he unzipped his space-pants and prepared to space-pee when he felt something strange
a feeling below his space-belt. "It can't be!" He space-yelped. All space-sheriffs take a space-vow of space-celibacy, but Spaceman went a space-step further. With every space-meal Spaceman takes a space-pill designed to keep him space-limp; and Spaceman never forgets to take his space-pills. "It must have been that space-woman with the space-red hair and space-butt to think about for space-days." he space-thought. "I must find out who she is!" He space-rushed out of the space-toilet, never even having taken a space-leak, to find the mysterious space-woman. He space-ran up and down the space-aisles of the space-store frantically space-searching. No space-luck. She was gone. Space-gone. "What am I space-doing? I'm a space-sheriff
BZZZT- NO, you're space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4 and you're needed down at space-city hall right away!!!
"My space-sheriff comm link! No space-time for that space-woman now, I've got to get my space-ass down to space-city hall."
In the great space-long space-hall of the black and twisted space-palace space-lay a space-throne made of malice and space-pain. From that very space-throne many space-travesties have been space-conducted as if evil were some kind of space-orchestra and its space-music were space-notes of destruction. Makha Dashka, our space-story's space-conductor, is space-composing the space-score to Spaceman's space-fall from space-grace.
"And his space-pain will rise like a thousand space-tides until the space-sweep to the space-crescendo- the sound of his breaking space-heart -and he will space-wash to space-shore in the soundless space-dark throughout the rest of space-time and space-space
BZZZT. bierpipderpdip. A space-lucent space-green space-face appeared in front of Makha Dashka, a space-hologram from one of his many space-minions.
"Space-general Dashka! We have received space-word from the space-woman; the space-bait space-lured the space-fish, but the space-fish space-swam up space-stream."
"You space-said what?"
"The space-bone was space-thrown to the space-dog, but the space-dog was space-called space-home to his space-master."
"Enough! Space-speak space-English for space's sake."
"I am space-sorry, space-master. The space-woman got Spaceman's space-attention, but Spaceman was space-called to space-duty by the space-mayor. Should we space-intervene?"
"I space-think not. We mustn't space-give away our space-plan
for now we space-wait
and space-adapt our space-plan..."
MEANWHILE AT SPACE-CITY HALL
"Right this way, Spaceman!"
A space-frantic space-intern space-raced ahead of Spaceman down the space-hall to the space-Mayor's space-office. The space-Mayor's space-office was as cluttered as a nebula.
-"This space-office is as cluttered as a nebula." Space-thought Spaceman.
Space-records lay space-scattered on the space-floor, space-pens leaking space-ink on the space-mayor's space-desk, space-week old space-donuts drying in the stale space-office space-air. It was space-city hall alright, but there was something seriously space-wrong this space-day. Sapceman could space-feel it. Behind the space-mayor's space-desk space-Mayor Gordon Mayor space-rocked space-madly in his space-brown space-chair to a space-chilling space-rhythm.
"I'm so space-glad you're here Spaceman."
-"What in space-hell is going on here, Mr. space-Mayor?"
"A space-travesty of Jupiter proportions! My youngest space-daughter has gone space-missing and I don't space-know who else to space-turn to, Spaceman."
-"Has she gone space-missing before? Maybe she has a space-place she likes to space-retreat to in space-stressful space-times?"
"She's a good space-girl, as bright as a star, she wouldn't just up and space-leave and not tell her space-father where she was space-going!"
-"I'll get to the space-bottom of this, Mr. space-Mayor, do you have a recent space-photo of her?"
"Sure I do, right here in my space-wallet
well, that's strange. I space-swore I just had my space-wallet right here
-"Has anything else gone space-missing recently, Mr. space-Mayor?"
The space-frantic space-intern space-bursted into the space-office, "Mr. space-mayor! The space-hog is space-gone!"
A space-rumble space-swelled in the space-void of space-space
The Spacemen, the space-hot space-rock space-band, space-blast from the space-speakers of the space-hog as it barrels through the gamma space quadrant. Sweet space-riffage space-echo in the space-luminum space-cabin of the space-hog.
"SPACE-WAHHHOOOO!" space-yelped the space-fair space-driver of the space-hog.
The space-hog, a space-sports space-car space-popular in the mid space-seventies, was the space-prized space-possession of the space-mayor. Space-orange with two space-green space-racing space-stripes over the space-hood, it was now space-pushing such space-intense space-speeds that the space-spoilers of the space-hog space-trembled from the space-force of the space-velocity. Griselda Mayor, the space-mayor's space-daughter, was behind the space-wheel. She was twenty-three space-years old and was finally starting to space-show it. Though her space-father couldn't space-see it himself, she wasn't a little space-girl anymore and she was space-ready to finally "space-live." Space-tossing her space-long space-blond space-hair around the space-cabin of the space-hog to The Spacemen, she was space-taking that space-hog in any space-direction that wasn't space-home.
"BZZZZT- Griselda! Is that you? Are you alright? Did someone space-nap you?!" The space-mayor's space-voice came in over the space-comm.
"Space-dammit, I totally space-spaced and space-forgot to turn off the space-comm. " Space-cursed Griselda. She space-pounded her space-fist down on the space-comm, space-shutting it off with a space-crackle on the space-control board. The space-hog was space-filthy. Like space-father like space-daughter.
"Alright, I've got space-daddy's space-wallet space-complete with his space-credit space-cards. Now let's get into some space-trouble
Space commander Spaceman, lone space-sheriff of space quadrant LX4, was on the space-case. His space-mission: space-intercept the space-hog and space-return the space-mayor's space-daughter space-safely to space-city hall. Spaceman space-ran to his space cruiser and space-hopped into the space-pilot chair. "Space-engines space-engage!" BWOOOORM! The space cruiser's space-engines space-ignited and with one space-thrust Spaceman was on the space-chase for the space-mayor's space-hog. Spaceman turned on his Nova-Location-Beam and space-input the space-specs on the space-hog. Dipdoodepdopdipdopdoop.
"Nova-Location-Beam has space-identified the space-hog, space-coordinates: 3.712693, space quadrant: gamma."
"What in space is she space-doing in the space quadrant gamma? I have to space-hurry."
On board an illegal space-speeder space-marked with the space-letters "M.D.", the space-woman with space-red hair and a space-butt to think about for space-days space-sits quietly space-receiving space-general Makha Dashka's space-instructions.
"Space-do whatever it space-takes. Space-intercept that space-hog and bring me the space-mayor's space-daughter
there will be no space-escape for her from my space-secret space-dungeon."
"Yes, of space-course, Makha Dashka."
"Space-excellent, your space-task will soon be space-complete and your space-debt to me re-space-paid."
"Thank you, Makha Dashka, may you space-live on in eternal space-light."
Space-communications space-ceased aboard the illegal space-speeder,
"Space-creep." She space-scoffed.
The illegal space-speeder neared its space-target. The space-woman took a space-deep space-breath and space-engaged her space-speeders neutralizer-torpedos. THWAMP THWAMP. From the space-barrels of her space-canons two neutralizer-torpedos space-launched towards the space-hog. BOOM BOOM. Two space-direct space-hits.
"Alright now, space-girl, don't space-squirm."
"What the space?!" Griselda space-shrieked.
The space-hog's space-engines space-failed. Her space-comm went down. Then her space-shield. She was a space-sitting space-duck. It went space-quiet.
BARGUNGA GUNGA GUNGA GUNGA GUNGA.
Griselda space-opened her space-blinds and found the space-hog space-covered in a space-blue space-light. She couldn't space-see a space-thing. The space-hog was caught in the illegal space-speeder's space-tractor-web. It space-trembled in the space-void of space-space. The space-hog was being space-boarded. Griselda space-panicked and space-searched for a space-place to space-hide.
"The space-spice space-pantry!"
The space-round space-hatch on top the space-hog space-flew open
Griselda space-heard not a single space-thing
CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK.
The sound of space-heels space-stepping down the space-hog's space-hatch space-ladder. There the space-woman with space-red hair and the space-butt to think about for space-days space-stood fully space-robed in space-disguise, but you could still space-tell she was a total space-babe.
"Come out, come out, wherever you space-are
" Said the space-woman through a space-voice space-modifier. "I'm going to space-find you space-ventually
"Where is this space-bitch?" She space-grumbled.
Griselda space-gasped as her space-phone space-fell out of her space-hoodie space-pocket and space-banged against the space-bottom of the space-pantry.
The space-woman removed a space-square space-device from her space-pouch and space-clicked a big space-button right in the space-middle of it. FWOOOOOM. The space-lights went out. It was space-dark.
CLAM. BANG. KUUUSH. THWACK. thump...
BZZZT. derpidorp. "Alright, space-boys, I've got the space-prisoner in space-custody. Come space-claim her for your space-master." She informed Makha Dashka's space-minions.
"That wasn't such a big space-deal. Now to just space-lure Spaceman into our space-trap